“The man who does not first know himself will never be able to recognize how set apart the woman is who is standing before him.” — David Anthony Burrus
This is one of the most profound statements I’ve ever heard.
I’ve learned some valuable lessons over these last few years. I’ve watched countless relationship podcasts, prayed, and reflected deeply on what true partnership looks like through God’s eyes. Eve was set apart inside of Adam. When God was ready to multiply what was in him, He introduced the concept of multiplication through her—by giving her a womb. She was the vessel that would carry what God placed in him.
Today, men have countless options. But Adam only recognized Eve because he knew who he was first. God never had to tell Adam where she came from; he knew through revelation—through being deeply in tune with himself and with God. God put Adam in the first induced coma and performed the first open surgery, taking a piece of his rib. That act wasn’t just physical—it was prophetic. A man can never love a woman beyond his capacity to love himself.
When things went wrong in the garden, Adam blamed God for the woman He gave him. Sadly, that same mindset still lives today—blame, confusion, and division. We’re watching the same pattern repeat itself in our generation: misplaced accountability and a lack of self-awareness, while the enemy quietly deceives us out of alignment.
And because of that, very little is being multiplied. True fruitfulness and divine partnership can only happen when both man and woman walk in revelation, not confusion—when they both know who they are in God before they come together.
In Genesis 24, we see that kind of divine alignment again through the story of Isaac and Rebecca. Abraham sent his servant on a sacred mission—not to find just any woman, but the one God Himself had chosen for Isaac. Abraham understood that covenant relationships aren’t just about personal happiness; they’re about eternal alignment and generational destiny.
Before sending his servant out, Abraham declared, “The Lord will send His angel before you.” This wasn’t about human effort—it was heaven’s orchestration. Isaac didn’t chase. He didn’t have to prove himself. He trusted the process his father set in motion, and ultimately, he trusted God.
When the servant arrived at the well, he prayed a very specific prayer—not for beauty, but for character. He asked that the woman who offered him a drink and also watered his camels would be the one God had chosen. Rebecca didn’t hesitate; she didn’t negotiate. She labored in humility and obedience. That simple act revealed her readiness for destiny.
But here’s where many miss it: what happens when God sends you, but they don’t choose you?
When heaven has already chosen, but someone’s immaturity or insecurity blinds them to what’s standing in front of them? What happens when God’s answer looks unfamiliar, inconvenient, or not like the picture we imagined?
Rebecca could have said no. Isaac could have doubted the process. But they both said yes—and that yes shaped nations.
So many today pray for God’s best but reserve the right to reject it if it doesn’t match their preference. We want covenant without consecration, blessing without obedience, promise without process. But heaven’s alignments require spiritual maturity—especially from the one who’s supposed to recognize what God placed before him.
Because when God sends you and they don’t choose you—it’s not a reflection of your worth; it’s a reflection of their readiness. Rejection doesn’t cancel your calling; it redirects your path to where your “yes” will be honored.
Stay aligned. Stay obedient. Because when God chooses, rejection doesn’t just delay a relationship—it interrupts destiny.