I Choose Us – A Reflection on Marriage, Family, and Faith
In one of my favorite movies, The Family Man (2000), Jack Campbell (played by Nicolas Cage) is a wealthy, career-driven bachelor who suddenly gets a glimpse of what his life could have been if he had chosen love and family over ambition. A divine intervention allows him to experience an alternate reality where he’s married to his college sweetheart, Kate Reynolds (Téa Leoni). The phrase “I choose us” becomes the film’s heartbeat—spoken by Kate in two pivotal scenes. It’s more than a romantic declaration; it’s a reminder that love and family are worth choosing above success and ambition.
The First Scene – The Closet Argument
In the first scene, Jack struggles to reconcile his high-powered ambitions with his new family-centered life. He tries convincing Kate to move to the city so he can chase his career. Kate stands her ground, saying, “Maybe I was wrong. Maybe we can’t have it all. But I choose us. I choose the life we have here, our family, and our love.”
That moment becomes Jack’s awakening. It forces him to confront what real success looks like—realizing that fulfillment isn’t found in titles, money, or power, but in love, connection, and shared purpose.
The Second Scene – The Airport Farewell
By the end of the movie, Jack finally understands what he lost when he chose ambition over love. In a desperate attempt to make things right, he pleads with Kate not to walk away. She looks at him, full of emotion, and repeats, “I choose us.”
This moment captures the film’s redemption arc—both Jack and Kate realizing that happiness isn’t about “having it all.” True joy comes from prioritizing love and commitment over personal ambition.
Biblical Standards in Marriage
The themes in The Family Man echo the heart of biblical marriage. Ephesians 5:25-33 calls husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church—sacrificially, selflessly, and with devotion. Wives, in turn, are called to respect and honor their husbands, creating a partnership rooted in love and mutual submission.
Marriage is not a mere contract; it’s a covenant—an unbreakable bond before God. The vows “for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health” remind us that love is a daily choice, not a fleeting emotion.
Today’s Culture: Career vs. Family
In today’s culture, career ambition often overshadows commitment. Social media glorifies hustle culture, wealth, and independence, while relationships are treated as optional or temporary. Many men delay marriage until they feel “financially ready,” while women are told to “have it all” even if it means putting love last. The result? A generation chasing fulfillment but feeling emptier than ever.
Choosing ‘Us’ in Today’s World
To reclaim God’s design for love and family, we must:
1. Prioritize Covenant Over Culture – Marriage is sacred. Build your foundation on faith, not social trends. “What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate” (Matthew 19:6).
2. Redefine Success – True success isn’t about wealth but about the legacy of love, faith, and family we leave behind.
3. Value Sacrifice – Love means laying down personal ambition for shared purpose, just as Christ did for us.
4. Reclaim Dating for Marriage – Date with intention, not convenience. Seek God’s plan, not the world’s patterns.
5. Teach the Next Generation – Model and teach that marriage and family are blessings, not burdens.
A Call to Action
The Family Man reminds us that we don’t have to choose between love and purpose. God can weave both together beautifully when we align our hearts with His design. In a world that celebrates independence, may we boldly declare, “I choose us.”
Whether you’re married, single, or preparing for your future, remember—love is not weakness, and family is not a distraction. They are divine assignments. True legacy isn’t built on platforms or bank accounts; it’s built around dinner tables, prayer times, and generations who know what it means to choose each other.